1. From time to time, jump out from behind shelves and yell “CRUCIO!!!” Look disappointed when it doesn’t work.
2. Ask a cashier if this is the place where you can pick up the new book for Advanced Potions.
3. Announce that Storytelling Hour featuring the works of Cassandra Claire will be happening in the Children’s section.
4. make photocopies of your favorite Draco/Harry and Snape/Hermione fan art and distribute it at the door with the header: “HBP SPOILERS!!”
5. Scream, “TROLL IN THE TRAVEL SECTION!!!” and pretend to faint. When you wake, demand to see Madame Pomfrey.
6. Walk up to an individual and whisper, “the mark, it burns…” Walk away rubbing your arm, and glance back periodically with shifty eyes.
7. Make derogatory comments about people’s “houses” based on what colors they’re wearing. Ex: “Pureblood bitch,” to a girl with a green blouse, or “Why don’t you go study, nerd!!!” to a boy in blue.
8. Approach a group of adults and start a casual conversation by asking what house they were in. When they look at you strangely, apologize by saying, “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize they were letting Squibs in here tonight.”
9. Try to convince small children that the “Monster book of Monsters” is hiding somewhere in the store. Tell them that it already ate one little boy.
10. Come dressed as Darth Vader, and try to convince other attendees that it’s actually they who are in the wrong place.